All that was Prologue is now Past

Like a dream, the sea
roils and twists into whirlwinds
that clash against sky.

Helpless figures drown
and gasp, sodden from vengeance's
sour coil. Ships crumble

and tremble; death's shroud
slices through blood; slaves ponder
the wonder chainless

limbs would promise. He,
Prospero, master of the
isle, stares forlorn

at his construction.
The end is forecast, a dance-
dalliance of love

applauded, arranged
by design. The fools of drink                             
and scheming plots meet

feasts and familiar
faces. Magic's slithery
touch pervades the bright-

dark journey of man's
lost and regained valor. Sleep
is found, kept close, and

cradled - conjures fan-
tastical visions of storms
untempered and stern -

of books shimmering
with a desire to know the
unknowable earth.

Man makes false monsters.
Brother moves against brother,
lovers find love, and

the ache of broken
hearts are mended, made true, soft,
free; and like a dream

the peril has passed by -
nefarious pages packed
away; trickery

grows heavy with peace.
The wind tucks itself into
nooks and crannies, still

and satisfied, in
tree shades. The spirits' bodies
contort into wings

when Ariel's acts
of fancy are retired.
Kings, princes, dukes, slaves

are joined in shared awe
of a victory won-made-
held by a man whose

magic shapes them all.
An unseen crowd crows its glee,
and all fades - complete.

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Keepeth My Daughter a PURE Virgin OR ELSE Fer-boy

Okay this is how this whole discussion of marriage in Act IV would have happened in modern times:

PROSPERO: So my daughter? Yeah, she's a virgin--mainly because we've been stuck on this island since she was 3-years-old. But also, I'm really controlling and focused on the idea of keeping her "pure" or whatever that means, so can you like...just not hook up? Until you're married? You know like us good ol' Christian and law-abiding folks do?
FERDINAND: I don't know man, er--I mean sir...I love her and so I really like, respect her, and if she wants to hook up then...I'm not gonna argue with that to be honest.
MIRANDA: Life! Love! So many possibilities I had never even dreamed of! Let me just live life to the fullest and experience everything!
PROSPERO: MIRANDA, NO! PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE! I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU TOUCH HER VIRGINAL KNOT--
FERDINAND: Hey man...you need to cool it. She isn't your property, and you need to stop acting like this marriage is you passing your property onto me. I love her, and she loves me, and that's totally cool, so we're just gonna ride that totally tubular wave.
PROSPERO: She IS my property and everything needs to go HOW! I! AM! PICTURING! IT! It's my way or the highway so you just need to deal with it or I'll cause another storm and kill your surviving family and friends!
MIRANDA: Wait...what did you say Dad?
PROSPERO: What? Nothing? *casts an illusion spell to make them forget the last ten seconds* What I mean to say is...I care about you, and don't you want to be the best wife you can be to him? To a prince?
MIRANDA: How does what we do in the bedroom make any sort of difference though, father? Won't I still be the person that I am? The person that he fell in love with? How will I be any sort of changed?
PROSPERO: Your...body will be different. And that's what's not okay. You just like...*need* to be a virgin okay?
FERDINAND: *whispers to Miranda* If you had been outside of the island...these are really dated conceptions your father is speaking of. Women used to be seen as property, and that's *totally* not how it is anymore. You can do whatever you want with your body! We'll discuss this alone later tonight.
PROSPERO: I HEARD that--what? Oh. I need to go take care of something. Don't come within two feet of each other until I get back! *runs away*

Breaking the News to Prospero

Ariel appears to Prospero who is just sitting around

Ariel: Hey, so I may have heard some things.

Prospero: What do you mean?

Ariel: So I put the king and his men to sleep but left his brother, Sebastian, and your brother, Antonio, awake. It seems like Antonio is trying to murder the king and blame Gonzalo...basically he is trying to get Sebastian the throne.

Prospero: Looking at the ground and shaking his head Ugh my brother is up to his old habits. Has he not learned his lesson yet? Quick go awaken Gonzalo with whispers of the threat that is against the king.

Ariel disappears again.

Prospero: This day cannot get any worse they are going to ruin my plan.

A few minutes later Ariel reappears with a look of nervousness on his face

Ariel: So ugh got more bad news. Heard some more stuff. Seems like someone is planning to murder YOU now.

Prospero: HOW? I have shipwrecked them here using a storm. No one is aware that I live here or that anyone lives here for that matter. Who? Who is trying to kill me?

Ariel: Not anymore. There are two men who shipwrecked with the king on their way to murder you while you sleep. They found Caliban and he recommitted himself to be the ones servant if he murders you and takes control of the island.

Prospero: Can a man not just take his afternoon nap!? Its tiring sinking a ship and conducting a master plan. I am going to be cranky for the rest of the day now.

That's Why They Call Me a Prophet

Before Merlin leaves to go to the woods he tries one last time to warn the boy of his threefold death that shall occur.

Merlin: (to young boy) Psssttt… come here.

Boy: What do you require of me now? The queen already made me cut my hair, change my clothes and dress up as a woman.

Merlin: I’m off to my life of wonderful solitude in the woods, but first I must tell you I was not kidding before, you must avoid high rocks, trees, and the river in your future for it shall lead to your death.

Boy: There’s no way you are correct about my death. King Rhydderech and the queen already proved you to be a fool.

Merlin: Fine, do not believe me, but I have seen your fate.

Boy: under his breath Fool

*Many years later*

Boy (now man): I think I will go hunting today… horse slips on rock and he begins to fall

Uh oh…

Merlin:

Some opportunities were missed today ladies and gents

End of Scene 4 Act 7
When all of the people Faustus tricked/wronged are confronting him:

Mephostophlilis (Meph): Yo Faustus let’s have some fun with these guys? How about instead of growing hay we just make it come out of his mouth when he talks, haha yeah then he can’t complain about the hay you took well..ate...Or anything for that matter.
Faustus: nah, I’ll just make him dumb.
Meph: okay okay but hear me out, what if we make it so everyone that Dick sees looks/sounds like an Ape...?? Get it?? Because i turned him into and ape, classic.
Faustus:....um nah, I’ll just make him dumb too.
Meph: DUDE! Come ON! Okay, what about just TURNING this horse dude into an actual horse? That would be GOLD!
Faustus: Nope [charms horse dude to be dumb]
Meph: Seriously you do all this messed up junk and NOW you just want to ignore them? Just gimme the last guys (Robin) soul or even the soul of the hostess and I’ll be cool.
Faustus: [stares at Meph.. right into his eyes as he charms both the hostess and Robin to be dumb]
[END SCENE]

What it is REALLY like to be an angel

Bad Angel and Good Angel in the angel human watching head quarters.

Bad Angel: Honestly, I am so tired of watching all these humans do such great things like saving the world or following in what God teaches them.. *rolls eyes*

Good Angel: You couldn't possibly quiet down while I am watching this new human John Faustus.

Bad Angel: Finally someone new who could possibly be corrupted by Lucifer himself and his minions.

*continues watching as Faustus talk of magic*

Good Angel: I have to stop this! In the name of God himself! I must make sure that he is turned away from these treacherous deeds of magic. He has no idea what he is getting himself into with this nonsense.

*Bad Angel ignores all that Good Angel is saying and goes to earth to help persuade Faustus of the greatness of magic.*

Good Angel: Oh! Woe is me! What shall I use to help him find the right path? *looks to screen* OH NO! I need to get there as fast a possible and stop the Bad Angel from doing anything to get Faustus to follow Lucifer!

*Good Angel departs to fight Bad Angel on Earth*

Mephostophilis is so done

Mephostophilis speaking to Azazel in between summons. They are standing outside a Demonic Bar. Mephostophilis agitated and banging his head on an obsidian wall while Azazel laughs at him. 

M: (Bangs his head on a wall made of obsidian) This idiotic master! You know what the first thing he asked me to do?

A: (Looks up and down at Mephostophilis, smirking) What? Did he ask for the usual? Gold? Women? You are being a bit dramatic.

M: (Looks at Azazel, wide eyed and offended) Dramatic?! This man is a waste on my time! So, with his new found POWER he decided he wanted to go after the Pope.

A: (His smirk becomes a full on smile, baring his fangs while throwing out his arms) Finally! That man had it coming to him for years! What did he do? I did not see his name on the Lost and Departed Souls List. What became of him?

M: (Lays his head back on the wall of obsidian, shaking it as if disappointed) My new found "master" decided to do the most childish thing; which wasted my time! 

A: (Tilts his had to the side, smirking, arms folded) Oh come now. It couldn't have been that bad. What did he demand to do that was so horribly awful?

M: (His head whips around, glaring fiery daggers) He decided to play a trick on that man. He took his food, then his goblet. It lead to the confusing of the Pope and to my "masters" amusement. We did beat some Friars. I did enjoy that part. However, I do not understand these humans. He asked for such a great power, gave HIS SOUL for it, and he waste it on trifle tricks and brainless schemes. I fear I may kill him before the four and twenty years are up.

A: (Whistles) You do have your work cut out for you. This man seems to be one of ignorant nature.

M: (Starts to pace, throwing up his hands) You are right about that. He still believes that there is no Hell. I still cannot fathom why he insists on continuing his ignorance. He must truly be delusional! He sold his SOUL to a DEMON for Lucifer's sake! Does he believe that a contact signed in blood means nothing?! He met the Seven Deadly Sins! What more does this man need?!

Mephostophilis begins to feel the pull of a summoning. He groans, smacking his forehead. Azazel smirks and winks at him. Mephostophilis glares and vanishes. He appears in front of Robin and Dick. 

M: Internally: I have no time for these clowns. (Turns them into an ape and a dog) I do not have the time nor the patience to deal with these humans much longer. (Disappears)

CAN I PLEASE GET A DAD JOKE?

Act 4, Scene 2

... Faustus is struck, and his head falls clean off.  Then Benvolio stands straight up and with a cocky nature, he looks over to Martino and with a wink and a grin says he says "Hey Martino, how does the headless horseman like his coffee?". Martino with a look of complete disgust and confusion replied "wha- what?". Benvolio in a soft awkward laugh says "decapinated! HAHA.... do you get it like decaffeinated but like decapitate...cause his head is off?". Martino gathers his breath as if he is about to yell as the body of Faustus begins to rise from the ground. Instead of saying words of anger and disgust at Benvolio he let out a scream so powerful it could shatter a wine class. Fautus' body bends over, picks up his head and then lets out a stretch as if he had just awoken from a deep sleep. Faustus yells "WOOO WEEE THAT'S NEW!" Then the scene resumes as written.

Status Report

Status Report of John Faustus’ soul

Upon receiving John Faustus’ contract in which his soul is given to you, my lord, in exchange for infinite demonic magicks and otherworldly powers for exactly four and twenty years, Faustus has made use of said powers in a way that is…well, interesting.

He wished for a wife, so I presented him with a rather enthusiastic demon, just for a bit of fun, but he wasn’t much impressed. I gave him gold and luxurious clothing and even entertained him with the infamous Seven Deadly Sins. I have shown him the reach of our powers, and yet I am still baffled by this man.

He requested to play tricks on the Pope, for instance. He had us disguise ourselves as cardinals and go to a banquet so that we might steal food and dishes, but we ended up beating up a bunch of friars to escape.

I feel as though my powers are wasted on this type of frivolous nonsense, but, then again, people have sold their souls for less. I’m not sure why I expected more from this Doctor Faustus. Of course, he has requested knowledge, and he certainly has learned more than any regular man on Earth, but I still cannot take him seriously.

Just yesterday, he wanted to play a joke on a horse-courser by selling him a horse that dissolved in water. When he came to complain, Faustus pretended to be asleep and had me conjure up a fake leg that the horse-courser pulled on to freak him out. Is this what I have been reduced to? A means for practical jokes and amusement?

Unfortunately for Faustus, his time is almost up. He foolishly still thinks that hell is not real and that he will not suffer once he is decimated and damned for all eternity. My only hope is that we won’t see each other in hell very often. I’ve already suffered enough with him on Earth.

Yours in Damnation,

Mephistopheles

Faustus` dream/ what could have happened

*Faustus in a dream*

Faustus: Mephistopheles, you cannot convince me. Hell is beneath me and I shall overcome it.

Mephistopheles: Faustus you're a fool. I live my hell everyday. Let me show you.

Faust. : Show me what you must but it won't change me.

*Mephistopheles opens a doorway to a future where Faustus will be the devil's servant*

*Faustus is surrounded by a burning world, a dark haze sits over the land as far as he can see, Lucifer sits high atop a pile of dead mortal bodies that he sees as his throne*

Faustus: I'm unfazed by this Mephistopheles, did you think this would bring me pity for my future?

*Mephistopheles is silent, bowed on one knee facing towards the throne. Suddenly Faustus is thrown to the ground, a rush of pain convulses over his entire body* 

Lucifer: You damned fool. Who do you dare think you are facing your boss on both feet? Do you, Faustus think a thing through your mind, or has the fire burned a hole through your skull.

*Faustus feels a slow drip of blood slide down his cheeks and into his hands. He reaches up to feel his head and slides his fingers over an empty space where his ears used to sit*

Lucifer: Now that gives you an excuse you haven't got a brain now have you? Now go on. Mephistopheles, make sure he gets a grand tour why don't you? 

*Mephistopheles nods and raises Faustus to his feet"

Faustus` thoughts race. He wants to speak but nothing comes out. He wants to turn around, but he has no control over his legs, let alone the rest of his body. 

Mephistopheles: I know what you're thinking, "why can't I control myself?" well, get used to it. Satan uses you as he wants. Your mind may be your own, but your soul and body belong to him forever.  You can say what he wants you to, nothing more. You'll get used to it right?

Faustus panics in his mind, but on his face he shows no emotion.

Mephistopheles: After a few thousand years it feels normal *laughs* Its what you always wanted!

Faustus tries to stay calm but mentally, he's unsettled. He pictures himself living in Hell for his years to come and he's overcome with grief and agony.

*Faustus wakes up in a panic*

Mephistopheles Doesn't Have Time For Your BS

Mephistopheles is at the water cooler with other demons, on break in Hell Inc.

M: Then I said, "Send him to the pit!"

M and other demons laugh.

Demon 1: Hey Meph, are you going to Beelzebub's bachelor party? I heard it's gonna be lit!

M (Drinking lava out of a paper cup): Maybe...my soul quota is just about filled. I just need one more soul and then I get one extra vacation day!

M and Demons all cheer, a lesser demon/imp flies in with a clip board up to M: Mephistopheles! Big Boss needs you in his office right away! It's about your quota!

M and imp/demon are in Lucifer's office. Lucifer is smoking a thick cigar and blows rings that look like tortured faces. Outside his window there are volcanoes and a lava river, now and then you would be able to hear a tortured scream. 

Lucifer (smiling): Glad you could make it Meph! Congratulations on almost meeting your quota!

M: No problem boss, what do you need?

Lucifer sifts through a pile of papers on his desk and holds up one manila folder: This is [REDACTED] Faustus, or just Dr. Faustus! He's a doctor studying theology and thinks he's smarter than a pack of smarties! He wants to dabble in the dark arts and learn all the worlds knowledge and maybe help people but, we all know that's not true (chuckles).

M (Chuckling): Good one sir! 

Imp/demon (chuckles)

Lucifer: Anyway, this is your final soul! He's a tough cookie so you have access to the Seven Deadly Sins to get him interested. He has the attention span of a squirrel so it won't matter. And remember, you get an extra vacation day if you get him to sign the contract!

M: You can count on me sir!

Lucifer: Oh, and one more thing, God will be trying to stop you, so make sure you do everything you can! He's Catholic! 

M nods and poofs out of the office. Lucifer sighs and looks out his window and speaks to himself as he reads through Faustus's record.

Lucifer: Poor Meph...this human is the absolutely worse. Not even the demon unions can help...

What not to say to a demon

Faustus summons demon

Mephostophilis appears

 Faustus- Now Demon you must wait on me hand and foot! You must wait for my commands!

Mephostophilis- Yeah… funny thing, can’t do that, I answer to Lucifer.

Mephostophilis Internally- Oh my Satan! This guy! He summons me here like some low level demon and expects me to just, what?… sit around? And wait on him?! Demons have standards too! Damn huma-

Faustus- But I summoned you, Demon?!

Mephostophilis- I do have free will…

 Mephostophilis Internally- Is this guy for real? Does he think humans are the only ones with free will? Excuse me we have a Demons Union, we meet on sundays. Just got a pay raise, up to to three souls now!

Faustus- Then why are you here?

Mephostophilis- I wanted your soul…, oh and all you had to do was pray to my boss…

Mephostophilis Internally- Why do all these humans have to go around saying you have to do all this freaky shit to summon us?!?! Frankly it's getting weird… Drinking pee, riding flying goats, being a weak woman? Where the Hells Bells did they get this stuff?! I mean really, who even comes up with it? Now that whole ‘member stealing incident,’ now that was us! Us demons had needed some good old fashioned bonding time. It was good for team morale. Oh right THIS guy… what was he saying? Probably something stupid I bet…

Faustus- So tell me, how’d your boss become Satan?

Mephostophilis Internally screaming- SATAN HELP ME!

Evaluation

   It was that time of year again. A reminder was thrown in Mephostophilis' face everywhere he turned. "Be sure to evaluate your master!" all the emails read. Lucifer even bothered to create poster-illusions with big font that said, "YOUR FEEDBACK IS IMPORTANT." Mephostophilis groaned and finally began filling out the annual Devil's Master Evaluation.  

     1: My master is worthy of his position.  

     "Way to start out with a loaded question," Mephostophilis muttered. His first instinct was to slam on the “Strongly disagree” button and move on, but he thought that might not be fair. True, Doctor Faustus is completely clueless in how everything’s supposed to work. Like, he just assumed that by Mephostophilis appearing, he could just demand him to do whatever he wanted without even making a contract with great Lucifer first (1.3.35-43). Idiot. There are rules here, buddy-boo! And it’s not that Faustus is even doing this for the right reasons. He wanted riches! To be loved and admired! His motivations have nothing to do with devils! (1.1.75-94) Certainly, this makes him decidedly NOT worthy. But it felt mean to select “Strongly disagree,” so Mephostophilis settled for “Disagree.” 

     2: My master is devoted to Lucifer. 

    On this question, Mephostophilis did not hesitate to hit “strongly disagree” and move on immediately. That bloody human signed a contract, a LEGAL DOCUMENT, binding his soul to Lucifer. And he...he had the AUDACITY TO REPENT! (2.2.89-90) NOT. OKAY. Of course, later he changed his mind and was all, “Oh, Lucifer is great” (2.2.188). But that doesn’t change anything. The weakness was noted.  

     3: My master respects me. 

     Mephostophilis just laughed. Faustus doesn’t respect his boundaries when there’s things Mephostophilis doesn’t want to talk about (2.2.74-6) and Faustus refuses to let Mephostophilis inhabit his natural form! He called him ugly (1.3.25-6). “Disagree.”